Wednesday 31 May 2017

"Dominatrix Wanted: Will train."

Backstage st photo shoot for Juice magazine in the
beginning of my career. Sydney, Australia.
How did you start working as a Domme? Like most regular jobs, domination begins with training. Obviously, you won't find it on the local community college course list, but at most big cities in the western world, domination houses will provide training for apprentice mistresses. In 1999, I answered a wanted ad and became an apprentice at a domination house in Sydney. I got a limited amount of training, firstly through observing other mistresses in sessions and then slowly participating as a helper in sessions. Within two weeks, I was conducting sessions on my own (looking back that was quite rushed, yet there was a shortage of Mistresses where I was " thrown in the deep end" and had to learn rather quickly). I eventually moved to another domination house where I got more technical training and later opened my own independent studio in 2003. From 2004 to 2006, I toured USA, Europe and Asia. My world tour deserves it's very own article, as I had such excellent adventures.Though my start as a pro-domme was rather straight-forward, building the insight to catch the wanted ad on the newspaper and the courage to answer it was a long process that has been with me since a very early age. Anyone can wield a whip and call themselves "Mistress" and even many of them can be rather skilled in BDSM techniques. However no one can perform the job of dominatrix without being naturally dominant. Perhaps being an only child for the first six years of my life made me a bit of a spoiled princess. It is not far from the truth, as my ancestry goes back to a Portuguese Baron and a French Countess. Growing up in Brazil, where even middle class families can afford to have maids, I have become accustomed to being waited on hand and foot, while at the same time learning to show kindness, patience and respect towards those that serve me (as a true queen should). As a child, my manners were impeccable to such extent that my classmates nicknamed me "Milady" (trying to tease me, while it had the opposite effect!). Still, I was never bratty or bossy. I never had the need to. Friends would often join in games I invented and be happy to follow my instructions and guidance. I even had an obsession with rubberized shoes at age three! Talk about a true fetishist. And yes, I tied up and tortured my Barbies. Every so often, I get another childhood memory showing streaks in my dominant and fetishist nature. It all seems so clear when put together. Even so, though the tendencies were there, I only blossomed into BDSM as a teenager.

I first learned about BDSM in the early 90's via the internet. Chatting online, I discovered role-playing and fellow chatters soon questioned me if I was into S'n'M. I didn't even know what that stood for. But I was immediately curious and my exploration began. I devoured books, movies and all manner of information I could get. I went to fetish parties and played little games with friends and lovers. Still, it wasn't my only preoccupation as I was studying at university, so my development was gradual. When coming to Sydney (Australia) for a study abroad program, I was exposed to life in a western city and stumbled onto the Hellfire club. Until then, I had only played with people I knew. But the atmosphere drew me to engage with others in the club. An impressed submissive asked me where I worked as a domme. "What!? I can do this for work?!" The rest is history.

Originally published at:

Wednesday 17 May 2017

Top 10 Rules for How to Contact a Mistress

1. Use A Formal, Polite And Subservient Tone. 
If you haven't met Mistress, you won't know her style. She might be friendly and casual or strict and unforgiving. By using a formal tone you cover all bases. Most mistresses like to be treated like queens. Do you want her to feel strong and powerful when she reads your message? Then show your humility, politeness and submission with your words. It will start the interaction on the right foot.

2. Avoid Profanity
Would you say the “F” word to your doctor or in a business meeting or even better, if you met one of the royals? Of course not. Use the same attitude here. Mistress may eventually do very naughty things to you in the dungeon, but the first contact should be like a first date. Be on your best behavior.

3. Be Concise:  Get To The Point.
Because there are always more sub males than femme dommes, mistresses often receive loads of emails from prospective subs. This means we're busy, so don't waste our time with the story of your life in the first email you ever send.  Why are you contacting Mistress? Do you want a session? Do you wish to do domestic servitude? Or are you just offering adoring compliments? Whatever the case, be brief. Say What you want using a small amount of words while still being polite and humble of course!

Tuesday 2 May 2017

BDSM Basic Questions

-Is BDSM Safe?
In my case, absolutely everything I do is consensual, which means all participants agree with it and I am extremely concerned with physical safety, hygiene and the mental health of my slaves. But as with any situation, there are people out there that don’t play too safely, as for instance they will take hard drugs before or during a scene. That removes the control from the dominant and of course makes things rather sketchy… Yet the level of safety has more to do with the people involved rather than the activities they are engaging in.

-Isn’t it really “hardcore”?
It can be, but only once you become more experienced in it.  

-Are there different levels of Domination?
Not only levels but styles. From Beginner to experienced, wherever you are that’s a level. As for styles, it all depends on the people involved and what they are into. For example, some people may be into heavy pain wile others like adoration, as foot worship.
 -Is BDSM about pain \ humiliation \ power or lack of power?
Again, it depends on the person, but it’s not ALL about pain. Yet, most BDSM has some level of power exchange.

- Do "normal" people like BDSM?
What is your definition of “normal”? If you mean mentally stable, then of course yes. Playing in BDSM doesn’t categorize you as insane. If you mean “average”, then in general, the answer is no. BDSM is rather complex and people with average intelligence usually do not have the mental capacity to challenge their social conditioning and take a step into that unknown, unusual experience.

-What kind of people like this kind of interaction?
The majority of serious players are successful business people or groups with a higher than average income, and  with a flare for extravagance and decadence. BDSM play usually involves lots of toys, fetish clothes, and other equipment and most of this stuff is expensive. There are exceptions to the rule of course. And as I said before, people who are seriously into this tend to more intelligent than the average person. Recently BDSM has become more “popular” with loads of people flocking to parties like Wasteland. I can tell you from personal experience the majority of them is not into REAL BDSM interaction. They dress up in fetish clothes, get high on drugs, and go to the party to dance and fuck. BDSM is a lot deeper than that.

- What’s the sexual kick?
That depends on the role you take. The submissive gets a kick out of losing control and being used and owned like an object. It may sound crazy, but that actually gives one an immense feeling of freedom. Explain freedom to and freedom from.
Now the dominant has the exact opposite turn on. The knowledge that someone is giving themselves to you, the power you can exert on another person WITH THEIR CONSENT, it’s a huge ego trip. Mental and emotional manipulation is an incredibly fun game. Most people in the world do it, especially females. But in my case it is CONSENTED. My slaves WANT to be manipulated. So we are both happy playing our complementary roles.

- What equipment is used?
Again that depends on the interaction and on the person. Let me show you some of my toys.

-What Costumes are used?
Whatever turns you on. I love Victorian gowns and corsets, but of course, because I like variety, I have LOADS of different styles of costumes. Many people are into Latex and Leather.

What kind of roles are played?
It all depends on your imagination. Nurse and patient, Teacher and student, Boss and secretary, the possibilities are endless!

-What other services do you do?
I don’t provide a service. I do what I like with my slaves. If their kink happens to be in my list of enjoyed activities, then lucky for them. If not, then they can find someone else. I don’t make compromises with slaves. It’s my way or the highway. And if by services you mean sexual services, then the answer is NONE. I do not blow slaves, but I’ll spit on them. I don’t wank slaves, but I’ll tie up their privates and whip them, and I definitely don’t have sex with them, unless of course I’m wearing a strap-on…

Originally published at:

Tantric Domination: The Art of Dancing to Flow

Tantric Domination: The Art of Dancing to Flow I must warn you. Even though I have years of experience in this field, I feel intimidated ...